Survival

The most wonderful thing about survival, is survival itself. You never know exactly what it is that you’re going to accomplish after some of the deepest darkest times in your life, But it is truly during those deepest darkest times, that you will realize the internal strength that you truly do have. At least you will once you get to the other side of the issue.

If you look back over your life, you have currently made it through 100% of what you felt was the worst day(s) of your life probably 15 times over. You’re still here. You survived it and you’re still putting one foot in front of the other every single day. That is something to be applauded, that is something to be celebrated, and that is absolutely something to be proud of!

The other amazing thing about survival is how you inadvertently become a hero to someone else that you may not even know about. Your story of survival could be relayed to a friend of a friend of a friend, and because that person heard your story, they made changes in their life. And you have no idea the impact that you made. Funny to think about isn’t it? We always look at our close circle of family and friends and never think about the ripple effects. It is wonderous thou. That I can assure you.

So right now in this very moment of reading this, I want you to pat yourself on the back and BE PROUD of yourself. Because you survived and you are making a difference just by being here and being you.

Humans

“At the end of the day, I’m at peace, because my intentions are good and my heart is pure.”

– Nirnayee Esabela

In this life you will come across a multitude of humans. All will be phenomenal in their own right. Some will be the light that shine through the darkness and quite frankly some will be the cause of your darkness. And those people are not always the ones we get to choose because they are family.

Here is the bottom line. Your personal mental health is very important. And you must pay attention to those lessons that are being taught to you by all of those people. And those lessons are how you allow yourself to be treated. Mother, Father, Sister, Brother, Son, Daughter, Grandmother, Grandfather, Aunt, Uncle, Cousin…etc. You must be treated with at the minimum decency. There should be respect as well, but respect is touchy as it is a very personal emotion and in my humble opinion has to be earned. But decency is not an option short any type of physical abuse.

In those moments where you must evaluate those individuals in your life that you are unsure of. You must ask yourself these questions.

  1. Does speaking to them bring me joy or heartache?
  2. Do I always have to edit what I am saying so I don’t upset them?
  3. Do I have to make myself less than who I am or who I am trying to be, just to not create an argument?
  4. Do they provide any value to the relationship?
  5. Are they continually making you feel guilty for trying to establish boundaries?
  6. Are they continually playing the victim?

These are just a few questions that will help you to understand if this relationship is one that will help or hinder your everyday mindset. And as difficult as it may be to understand, just because an individual is family, that does not make them good for you. You sometimes have to realize that you have done everything you can for the relationship and it is time to allow the relationship to change into nothing more than an acquaintance, if even that. Your decisions in your life have to be right for you and only you. The people I spoke about above, the ones who lead you to the light, they would never put you in a situation to lose them. The others, well they make it very easy when you separate the emotion from it.

My advice to anyone who is having difficulty making the decision is this; First, listen to those around you, are they telling you the relationship is toxic? They are probably right. They are on the outside looking in and not emotionally invested, as you are. The second piece of advice that I have is a little more difficult, but just as powerful. Look at your situation and imagine that it is a friend of yours going through it. What advice would you give them? If your advice would be for your friend to remove the family member, then that is your answer.

Those who deserve your light and love will remain in your life. And those who don’t will exit through the door making room for more amazing and wonderful people. Those new people will match your higher vibration and appreciate the wonderous human that you truly are. Look for those people. They are your tribe.

Perceptions

Perceptions are very interesting things. As an example…. In a group of three people. Person number one is exhibiting outward emotions. Person number two sees those emotions as someone who is hurting and needs empathy and grace. Person number three sees those emotions as someone who is angry and needs to be calmed down and redirected. Perceptions. Funny thing is, both perceptions could be right, or both could be wrong. Where I feel we go wrong as a society and do a disservice to our fellow humans is by not just doing the very simple task of…. asking.

We all get caught up in the idea of what we think is going on or more accurately what we believe is going on. Sometimes it is better just to stop and ask. “How are you today?”. I have never claimed to be perfect, nor will I ever claim to be. What I will say is that I never stop trying. I make mistakes. All the dang time. But I still keep trying. That is what my wish is for you. At least keep trying. For as long as you are trying then this old rock we are all spinning on still has a chance.

Love and Blessings,

Dawn

Let it Rain

“The best thing one can do when it is raining is to let it rain.” ~ Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

What did Henry mean by this? In my humble opinion it means sometimes, just let life be life. We strive for complete and total control over every aspect of our lives that we forget that live is an amazing journey. It is filled with colors, feelings, thoughts… a multitude of impacts on all of our senses that we end up no longer living our own lives, just existing in them.

Sometimes in life, rather than try to control everything, the very best thing to do, is absolutely, unequivocally, nothing at all. Just live.. enjoy… experience…. and see what the next day, the next hour or even the next minute will bring. Be thankful that life still holds those magical surprises for you. That is the magic in letting it rain, think of the world after a rain storm and how magical it is. Clean, fresh, beautiful. That is why we should just let it rain.

Love and blessings,

Dawn

Greatest Gift

What is the greatest gift that we can give ourselves? That is an interesting question that has been asked and answered many times over. Some say love, some say forgiveness, some say grace… I think the answer is much more simple.

I think the greatest gift that we can give ourselves is acceptance. Let’s face it. We have all done or said something that we have regretted, wished we could change or take back. But in the moment, most of us do the things we do out of love for the people we care about.

So what if we stumble and fall? What if we make mistakes? So what if we hurt people we love? It is how you choose to respond to those situations that creates the you in the situation. Look back with open eyes and an open mind. Did you approach the situation from truly a place of caring and wanting to help or did it come from a place of ego? Then respond appropriately from there. No one is perfect! I know every single time I try to walk on water I SINK! And I can guarantee anyone reading this does as well.

So the message here is to just accept yourself with all of your flaws and realize they are what makes you the amazing, beautiful, wonderful, perfectly you for the world that is uniquely YOU! Sure we will lose people along our path of life, and that is okay. Everyone crosses our path for different reasons. Just keep your chin up and accept you for you. Because you are making the world a better place just by being in it.

Light and Blessings,

Dawn

The biggest fear

I think in life, our biggest fear is loneliness. Some people are very very happy being single, but they replace a spouse with a larger group of “friends”. I put friends in quotations only because I believe the circle would be better described as acquaintances. Most often when you find yourself with a large friend group, the connections are more superficial and are only used to pass the time not being alone.

If you are lucky, and I mean very lucky… you find a small friend group that gets you. Is there for you with no ulterior motives. And you are the same for them. This doesn’t mean that you agree on everything, although you could, but what it does mean is that if you don’t agree. It is still okay and you are still friends.

Having a support group that understands you, believes in you and wants the best for you is worth more than all the money in the world. Having that support system is the most valuable in life, especially in those days where you are feeling down and out and not quite yourself. They are the ones who are there to pick you up, dust you off and tell you it is going to be okay.

If you have this tribe around you, you are truly blessed and you should call, text, email or even send a carrier pigeon to let them know that you appreciate their presence in your life and that you love them. Nothing goes further in life than unsolicited love and adoration for your friends.

Oh, and if you are lucky enough to find all of this in a spouse… Don’t let that person go, keep them forever!

Agree to Disagree

“Believe in your infinite potential. Your only limitations are those you set upon yourself.” ~ Roy T. Bennett, The Light in the Heart

The only way that any of us are ever going to be able to agree on anything is to agree to disagree. I realize how crazy and convoluted that sounds, but it really is true. I used to tell my kids when they were younger that it is wonderful how different everyone in the world is, how boring would it be if everyone was exactly the same??!

The part that we all need to get back to, is that it is ok for each of us to have our own opinions about each and every topic. It is okay to be passionate about those feelings and even try to convince others to an extent, as to why we feel the way we feel. But what is NOT okay, is to demean, degrade, insult or become violent, when someone’s views and opinions differ from our own.

I was reading a Facebook post the other day, which happened to be a in Spiritualist group. The topic was regarding a question that was asked on if the group believed in Spirit communication and visits from loved ones after death. A gentleman who did NOT believe, vehemently responded to EACH AND EVERY comment made in support of such beliefs. His comments were all based in religious beliefs and he made several references and quotes to several bible versus.

Now I will be very honest here, I was getting very angry and upset, as were many other individuals at this individual. Most of his responses were very much “fire and brimstone” type of responses. Until one gentleman responded back to him which made me stop and think. This was several days ago and I can not quote you his exact words, but his response to this gentleman was in validation of this man’s beliefs, with understanding of the differences of opinions being presented and he even thanked the man for providing the references that he did. This man did go on to state that while the man was not changing his beliefs as he was a Spiritualist and had many experiences with deceased loved ones personally, moreover, being a Spiritualist meant being accepting of everyone’s higher beliefs and the God of their Understanding.

Now friends, this made me stop and actually almost feel ashamed of myself for a few moments. This man vocalized the epitome of the life that I am trying to uphold myself to and I had just been sitting in judgement of this “bible thumper”. I also then had to realize, that every single solitary time that I have tried to walk on water, I HAVE SANK. Yep, no perfection here for me.

So why am I writing all of this here for you on my first blog? Because I want you to know that we are all human, we all make mistakes, we are all learning each and every day. That is the part that makes us special. Those are the parts of myself and my journey that I am excited to share with everyone. Thank you for reading. Until next time. Love, Light and Blessings. Dawn…

Devotion

Have you ever thought about the word devotion? Have you ever thought about what it means to you? Dictionary definitions often describe devotion as what I have listed below:

profound dedication, especially to religion.

earnest attachment to a cause, person, etc.

an assignment or appropriation to any purpose, cause, etc.: the devotion of one’s wealth and time to scientific advancement.

Often devotions .Ecclesiastical. religious observance or worship; a form of prayer or worship for special use.

Now every single item listed above is a very powerful emotion brought about by someone’s beliefs as illustrated by someone having devotion to one’s religion, a purpose, cause or even a person such as a spouse or child. But all to often we forget the most important topic in devotion. OURSELVES. Now I am not talking about the latest trendy buzz words of “TREAT YO SELF” and “YOLO”. I am talking about the true devotion to one’s self. The devotion to happiness on a personal level, a spiritual level and even that higher self level.

Let me explain. We spend much of our lives searching for what everyone calls happiness. And in today’s society that often looks like the bigger house, the newer car, the fancier clothes and the more expensive vacations. We teach our children that happiness comes from stuff and things and “status symbols” rather than being the friend that is known as the reliable one. Or the friend that is there for you no matter what. I believe society as a whole as done a great disservice to the youth of today. They do not have the wonderfully close relationships that we (those of us who grew up in the 70’s and 80’s) got to experience. We had those ride or die friendships. Each one a little different but always special in it’s own way. Each person bringing their own light into the group and having that contribution in the exactly perfect way to compliment everyone else. One was the “Mom”, one was the “popular cheerleader”, one was the “Risk taker”, one was the “Brain”, one was the “Counselor”. The group as a whole was diverse. And you know what, it was okay. There was nothing wrong with the fact that the Cheerleader had the nicer clothes and the Brain read more often than not. It was OKAY! What does any of this have to do with devotion? Simple.

We lost that devotion to ourselves. That part of us that was okay being part of a group rather than being the center of attention. Being the center of attention is okay, but it gets awful lonely after awhile. Look at the Sun, it is the center of our universe, and nothing can ever come close to it. How does that sound like a fun existence? I would rather hang out with the other planets in the group and enjoy what they all have to offer than just burning everyone that comes across my path. Okay, maybe an extreme example, but you get the drift.

As the old saying goes, you can not pour from an empty cup. To me that means that you must have devotion to yourself. Now that doesn’t mean to just become the biggest wanker on the block. But what I feel that does mean is that it is okay to take time for yourself and the things that are important to you. If you are a parent, make sure you set time aside for things that do not involve your children, it will give you more patience with them. If you are in a committed relationship, have a hobby that does not involve them. That way you have something that belongs to you and only you. You can share the stories with them, but the hobby is yours.

Selfcare is important, but it goes far beyond the manicures, massages, fishing trips and the nights out on the town with friends. It means meditating, reading books on your favorite topics, taking a class on something that you want to learn about. Anything that is important to you. Devotion to being the best you that you can be should be your number one priority. Again, you can’t pour from an empty cup.

Thanks for reading. Love and Blessings. Dawn

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